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Flowers on the Guardrails

from Emergency Contacts by Tracy Manuel

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lyrics

you part the red and plastic sea of solo cups on couple’s night
and you say, “my body is a temple” and I said, “to miller lite”
I poured mine out in a potted plant and you asked if I was fine
I said “I guess it’s not my scene”
and you said, “god, I hope you’re right”

“because as far as I can tell
all these people won’t be long
they’re secretly afraid that hell
was real all along
and they’re all scared to die
because they don’t know how it feels
and then they’ll waste their afterlives
wondering why they’ve never healed”

then you disappeared to probably find some bathroom drugs
to do beside the vinyl shower curtain printed “live, laugh, love”
and you know I hate to hear that bathtub ring around your lungs
but you tell me not to worry, yeah, you tell me loosen up

you say,
“as far as I can tell
we’re only barely substance
so don’t be afraid of hell
it’s just the town that you grew up in
I'm not scared to die
I'll just go back to being nothing
I don’t need no afterlife
I think I've had enough of this one”

“so hush, now, now —
run along, the night is thick
with hearts to break and bones to pick
but still somehow
I just want out my misery
and you want me to let you in?”

I said, “look around
at all you trembling mortal hypocrites
just trying to disengage the fastest
if we leave right now
we’ll drive past flowers on the guardrails
and ribbons on the overpasses
flowers on the guardrails
and ribbons on the overpasses
flowers on the guardrails
sometimes I can barely stand it”

the stars are soda water bubbles splashed across a nylon dress
too dim to read the tattoo polygraphed across your chest
but I guess I still had reason to believe you when you said
“it’s gonna be alright” and when I tried to shake my head you told me,

“I can’t even tell
if life’s too short or long
I know loving me is hell
I know loving you is wrong
but try not to waste tonight
on only wondering what’s in store
‘cause when we reach the afterlife
you know we’ve seen it all before”

credits

from Emergency Contacts, released October 13, 2020

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Tracy Manuel Davis, California

SiNgEr-sOnGwRiTeR

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